If.

Isn't it strange how one little event can snowball to a disaster.
How one little reminder can destroy a lifetime of work...

If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings
And never breath a word about your loss;

If by Rudyard Kipling. I've heard it before, just never realised how apparent God can be in everything.

Imagine your all. Your everything. That one true thing you hold dear. Put it all together and risk it on a 50/50. Seems ridiculously pointless right? Yet sometimes the reward can be worth the risk.

I put my love on the line. For my own gain. For my own feelings. For me.


And I lost.

'And never breath a word about your loss;'... I couldn't do this. I tried so hard but realised...

By my own strength I am WEAK.

It's all by His strength

If you can meet with triumph and disaster
And treat those two imposters just the same;

If any of you actually read this... I just want you to know it's ok.

It is not a perfect world.

And losing something or someone... It kills me. Probably has to you to.

Pride is hard to swallow.

Admitting defeat?...No... Not defeat... Admitting it affects you. It is so hard for any guy to truly do.

At the end of this poem it says:

Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it,
And - which is more - you'll be a Man my son!

I still have growing up to do.

I have no idea if Rudyard Kipling was a christian or not.

You know what? That doesn't matter at all. God works in many ways through every person on Earth.

Being Christian isn't about going to church;
reading the Bible;
praying;
singing Jesus songs.

It's about one thing and one thing alone.

Having a relationship with God... A friendship... A bond between you.

That's it.

Nothing more, and nothing less.

If only I could understand what was happening.
If only you could truly get me.
If only... If only... I believed...

... you'll be a Man my son!

Yeah... Maybe one day...

Keep going... for Me yeah?
I know how hard it is but
I know you can.